I Love My Gay Son and You Cannot Change My Mind

Hi, it’s me, Amber.

I haven’t blogged in a very long time. I’ve missed writing but life has had me mute for a season. But, I’M BACK!!! And the reason I choose to come back with this particular topic is because I am so intrigued by Christians that actually love like Christ. It’s actually a rare attribute to find.

On Sunday mornings, at Transformation House in Greenville SC, I get to worship with the Kirwan family. I absolutely adore this family because they really are an example of like “tossed salad”. What I mean is that within the family you have “some of this and some of that” that comes together so beautifully. I can imagine the thing that really tossed the family up is that one of the Kirwan’s sons, Isaac is gay. At least that’s what I assumed, until talking to Mrs. Virginia, Isaac’s mom on this past Sunday. I said “I bet it is probably still hard at times right?” and I could have cried when she started to respond to me. I followed by saying, PEOPLE NEED YOU!! Which is why I asked her to join me in this blog.

Listen to her heart in this dialogue.

Me:             Mrs. Virginia how do you, as a Christian, accept your gay son?

Virginia:     Because I am his mom and he is my son. Who he is doesn’t change my heart or my role as his mom. I accept my child as he is with his loving heart, his adorable face and all of his gifts and I am proud of being his mom every minute.

Me:             How do you handle that with your faith? What about when other Christians feel your tolerance is not of Christ?

Virginia:     My faith tells me my number one job is to be a loving mom to my son. Nowhere can I find one thing that tells me different. I am so in tune with what God is telling me to do that what anyone else thinks I should be doing fades far into the background of my life. I have never felt so confident in God about anything.

The mistake Christians often make is thinking it’s their job to make sure everyone is doing what they (said Christian) perceive to be right. We need to do what God says is right.

My job is to point my son or anyone else to the overwhelming love of Jesus and trust that the power in that love will do whatever work God wills in that person’s life. All I have to do is love and that’s the fun part.

I have no problem letting people who question my tolerance know exactly where I stand.

Me:             If you could say anything to a struggling LGBTQ person or a struggling parent what would you say?

Virginia:     To the parent: Relax. Choose your child above all of those people whose opinions you are worried about.

God is more than able to bring answers in his time. I personally don’t need answers because it comes back to one thing for me. I know what I’m supposed to be doing.

To the child: You are worth EVERYTHING JUST LIKE YOU ARE. Let God love you, let us love you. Carry this heartache of rejection to him because he wants it. Nothing separates you from Him. Absolutely nothing!

There are too many broken relationships between LGBT people and their families and the root of the brokenness is God??? Does that make sense?

Virginia, I want to personally thank you for loving Isaac unconditionally. Thank you for not breaking his soul and his spirit. Thank you for not sending him out in a world feeling unloved and unworthy. Thank you for being his friend and a shoulder to cry on when the world is heavy. Thank you for being a perfect example of Jesus in his life. He smiles on you.